Vintage Victory! The Ambassador Double Burger & Sandwich Maker

As an ever-resourceful shopper, one of my favorite destinations is Unique Thrift Store in Downtown Brooklyn. Last week I gamboled around the premises for goodies and happened upon a vintage double burger cooker/sandwich maker that had to have been from the late 1970s.

When I opened the box, I was giddily amazed to discover that the item had never been used. All of the original packing was in place, it was pristine clean and even included the little recipe booklet. It was almost too good to be true. Perhaps the only thing better was the price: $7.99. Oh, come on, how could I resist?

Not only is the Ambassador "Burger & Sandwich Maker Double Size" capable of cooking burgers in one minute, but you can also make grilled cheese sandwiches and tuna melts, while using the "grill" to cook eggs, bacon and steaks. Eureka!

Once I brought my prize home, I searched the web for retro ads and any info I could find about the appliance... I found nothing, except one newspaper advert from a department store in 1978 offering the item on sale for $24.88.

On Friday, I cooked my first burger, and indeed it was better than any previous means I've used with modern technology. George Foreman Grill is a mess to try and clean, while a frying pan makes a spattered mess of the simple task. Of course, there are comparable devices made today, but every once in a while, they got it right way back when. And retro... even better. Delish! *

Fiverr Evolves From Amusement To Credible Proift Center

When my friend Paulie introduced me to a site called Fiverr several months ago, it seemed like an amusing destination to earn a buck or two here and there. The concept: Let folks know what you're willing to do for $5. At first I posted crap like, "I'll take a picture of your company logo anywhere in NYC for $5." I got a few grabs and made $4 on the take, after Fiverr took its commission.

But as I began digging into the site, I saw that folks were offering writing services, so I posted gigs for simple 150-word bios and quickie song reviews, posting my credentials as a professional journalist and Billboard writer for the past 25 years.

At the beginning, I was getting a couple assignments every week, which time-wise, did little more than bite into the hours I'd normally be surfing the webbie anyway. More recently, as the site has grown more sophisticated and popular—and my feedback has been consistently positive—I'm now getting gigs by the boatload.

Fiverr now also offers "extras," including longer versions of the same for more $$ and quick turnaround for $. And so... over the past month, I've earned $280, which is suddenly becoming real money... enough to pay the cable bill or the electric bill and purchase the occasional steak.

Mind you, my mainstay is still writing full-on professional bios for musicians, which include detailed interviews and quotes, garnering three-figure$ per pop. But for bite-size writing, what began as an amusement has evolved into a real profit center. And thank god for that, as a guy who still picks up pennies on the sidewalk. *

Quote: 'When Memories Become More Important Than Dreams'

Of all places, I heard the following quote in the Series Finale of Desperate Housewives, which has been sitting in my Tivo for months. It so struck a chord with me that I paused, played it again and scrawled it down... It's not pretty, by my god, it is truth. And I get it. Totally.

"You know you've hit middle age when memories become more important than your dreams."

It took me back to my first months in New York, when I had just arrived for my dream job at Billboard magazine in the fall of 1996. Such hope, such ambition... and for sure, every dream that I dared imagine for that job—which ultimately blossomed into a 14-year career—came blissfully true.

In the winter of 1996, January or February, I made a music video set to Collective Soul's "The World I Know," shot around my tiny, adorable, beloved studio apartment on the Upper West Side at 82nd & Broadway. Below is a trio of screen shots from the vid. I have a DVD that I managed to transfer from VHS years ago, but I have yet to figure out how the hell to load it to YouTube so that I might share it—and protect it. It is indeed a treasured memory... of my dreams. *

NYC Vintage Image: Photo Of The Day: ‘Stalked By Stork’ 1937

Times haven’t changed but so much between 1937 and 2012. Some 65 years ago, the U.S. was enduring a marked recession that lasted 13 months and catapulted unemployment from 14.3% in 1937 to 19.0% in 1938. Thankfully, in 2012, the national unemployment rate isn’t quite as dire—but it remains stagnant for a fifth dismal year.

On Friday June 15, the Labor Department reported that unemployment in May 2012 rose to 8.2% from 8.1% in April, the first increase in a year. In New York City, the May rate upticked from 9.5% to 9.7%.

That makes this vintage photograph from April 1937 all the more relevant. The 28-year-old unemployed Brooklyn resident is showing great ambition wearing a sandwich sign around his neck, proclaiming he’s “Stalked by Stork.” That, of course, means a baby is on the way. He’s looking for work in advertising, sales promotion, contract publicity and the like.

After digging down deep into the Internet, I found “A Woman’s New York” column written by Alice Hughes on April 13, 1937. She reports: "New York’s sidewalks are filled with ladies and gentlemen carrying signs. They may advertise a cheap beauty parlor or they may announce that the bearer, an American citizen, spent 10 months in a German prison and is very mad about it. But I met my favorite the other day. A young man was wearing a ‘sandwich’ which read, in part, ‘Stalked by Stork. I want work now!’ The gallant young man carried his sign and (walked) out of my life, but I certainly hope he got a job, don’t you? That ‘Stalked By Stork’ is a punch line if ever there was one.’" *

Ouch: Amid Constant Cuts, Billboard Continues To Ruin Its Reputation

It appears that I got out of my former career job at the right time. When Billboard magazine laid off the majority of its veteran writers in 2008-2009 (myself included) then-owner Nielsen was chopping its bottom line to bits in order to sell off its trade journals—including Billboard, Hollywood Reporter, Backstage (recently sold) and Adweek Media.

The resulting buyer, equity group Prometheus Global Media has sadly become a textbook example of what's wrong with today's publishing industry. In addition to forcing remaining experienced journalists to carry the weight of those who were fired, new hires are often inexperienced green kids on the cheap whose musical knowledge goes back about as far as Hanson.

When I arrived at Billboard in 1995, the mandate was that you were an expert in your genre, with a loaded Rolodex of sources, practiced talent as a professional journo and intensive knowledge of the music industry—before you were let in the door. After I left, one of my gigs as Single Reviews Editor, which had been a signature role for me for nearly a decade, was taken on by a former intern... Need I say more?

Several articles are making the rounds about the circumstances that continue to pound Billboard's legacy into the ground. The first, via deadline.com here. The second is at The Wrap here, which The Improper offers its perspective on here.

Among highlights: Deadline.com...
There’s a Billboard exodus underway at Prometheus Global Media. Popular publisher Lisa Ryan Howard was pushed out and high-profile Billboard editor-in-chief Danyel Smith and Billboard deputy editor Lou Hau have resigned. More staff are expected to follow. "Morale is in the toilet because the level of dysfunction there and inside Prometheus is off the scale," an insider says.

Prometheus is also stopping annual employee reviews so it can eliminate 2% raises. "Prometheus keeps trying to cut its way to prosperity." Prometheus, initially entitled e5 Global Media, made an acquisition from Nielsen in 2009 and was formed jointly by private equity partner Pluribus Capital Management: Neither have entertainment media experience.

The Wrap...
Billboard is bleeding top talent (as it) is in the process of cutting costs. This has produced low morale and prompted exits, as well as a fast rate of turnover. Financial troubles have plagued other Prometheus titles.

The Improper...Billboard's Failed Strategy Sparks Cuts, Staff Exodus; Magazine Writes for Audience That No Longer Exists: Back in the day, Billboard’s strength was its ability to reach tens of thousands of record store owners. Those days are long gone. Its major advertisers, record labels, fled, yet, the magazine has never been able to reinvent itself. Today, the magazine reads like a fanzine, even though it costs 10 times as much to subscribe as the leading fan publication Rolling Stone, which far exceeds it in quality and circulation. *

A Return To Radio Roots: By Golly, I Got A (Part-Time) Gig!

My career as a freelance journalist in the post-Billboard era (of nearly three years now) may offer some great benefits—such as working from home, setting one's own hours, no meetings with corporate suits yammering and an ongoing variety of different topics and genres to write about—but it also has a downside. There's the endless hustle of drumming up biz, the insecurity of no regular paycheck or benes (insurance, retirement, vacation) and... the occasional solitude of working from home.

At long last, I now have the best of both worlds. Starting with the new year, I secured a long-term part-time gig—five hours a day, five days a week—working for a well-known website that covers the radio industry. It's the most security I've had since working for the U.S. Census in 2010.

Toward the end of last year, I endured five phoner interviews to get the gig, proving that my background in broadcasting and music for the past 25 years met all qualifications for the post. Two weeks in, I'm having a blast, pretty much working 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., which gives me much of the day and night to continue doing my own thing.

And my workmates: each and every one is someone I either worked with at Billboard, Radio Monitor or R&R, or depended upon as a source during my decades as a reporter, columnist and editor. That's awfully sweet.

What a blessing: a regular paycheck again, plus the freedom to continue freelancing, all from my home base. 2012 is off to a good start... Lord knows it has a lot of making up to do for 2011's irksome 4Q.

Does 'TIme' Think Americans Are Too Stupid To Read News—Or Are Today's 'Professional' Journalists Just Too Dumb To Report It?

I read an intriguing if not frightening post on Daily Kos—that has appeared in similar form on a number of webbies—illustrating how Time magazine cover stories differ on a regular basis in the U.S. versus its three other markets: Europe, Asia and the South Pacific.

Overseas, the news mag devotes coverage to pivotal global stories impacting the world at large. Here in America, however, we get such vapid, self-absorbed nonsense as this week's "How Anxiety Is Good For You" or recent stories prattling about "Chore Wars," "Why Mom Liked You Best" and "Who Needs Marriage?"

The critical question that Kos asks: "Do these moments of marketing reveal more about Americans or about the state of American journalism?" I suspect the latter... With the majority of veteran writers laid off years ago, the average "professional" journalist simply doesn't have depth or experience to report on much beyond what they see on E! or Bravo. For example...

December 5, 2011: U.S. "How Anxiety Is Good For You" (Trust me, it's not) vs. "Revolution Redux" about new post-military Egyptian political rule.
August 8, 2011: U.S. "Chore Wars" in the banal battle of men against women and their bratty babies vs. "Travels Through Islam," examining a historical look at the region.
October 3, 2011: The asinine U.S. "Why Mom Liked You Best," the Science of Favortism (get over it) vs. "Why Germany Can't Save the World."
November 29, 2010: U.S. "Who Needs Marriage" vs. "The Lady Returns," about the Burmese Opposition politico.

Tough Turkey: I Don't Mean To Crash The Party, But...

Tough Turkey: In 1932, pictured above during one of the first Macy's Day parades—in the midst of the First Great Depression—the nation's unemployment rate was a whopping 23.6%. In 2011, 80 years later, the Second Great Depression's unemployment rate has been locked at 9.1%  all year, and 8+% since 2008.

More than 14 million Americans are without jobs this Thanksgiving, some of us for years, searching week after month for opportunities that simply don't exist. As you can clearly see in the Yahoo! poll from Tuesday at the right, I am hardly alone.

I am thankful for many of the simple things that continue to be good in life as we collide with another holiday season... most of all, friends & family, decent health and having a secure home... but I'm sure hoping the big picture is sunnier in 2012. For a year that has been burdened with unforeseen challenges and life-altering disappointments, unfortunately, a steaming bird and a plate full of mashed potatoes are merely a nice momentary distraction. Life marches on.

Pizza Tastes Even Better When It's FREE, Baby!

When one pretty much counts every dime as a freelance journalist, there's nothing better than being an active, veteran mystery shopper for free food.

In the past few weeks, I've gotten active again in a side biz that has fostered decent bucks posing as a customer at various retailers, then reporting back to the two dozen companies I'm associated with to rank service and quality.

Over the past couple years, I've visited cell phone shops, fast food joints, high-end department stores, bars, storage facilities, bodegas, banks, eyewear retailers... my god, I can't begin to remember all of them.

The best among the bunch: Earlier this year, I got a one-night stay =free= at a major hotel chain in NYC that included drinks, dinner, breakfast in the room and transportation. It was so luxurious it was sick. Mind you, the accompanying questionnaire took me days to fill out—but we treated it like a second honeymoon in our own hometown and were treated like kings. The total bill came to more than $700—for one damn night(!)—all on the house, plus a $40 incentive. How sweet it is!

On the lower end, how about free delivery pizza from a major chain, plus $7 in my kitty. Meow!

Hu$tling To Make A Living

Miss me much? Even amid the heart-wrenching separation from my partner of 10 years two weeks ago, I have tried to maintain at least one post a day on my pal The Smoking Nun. Today, I have been working on a freelance assignment of such gargantuan proportion that I actually missed my deadline—something that no matter how much I might procrastinate here and again, I never allow to happen (I got an extension until noon Saturday, thank heavens).

This gig was a godsend, distracting me from being a sad sack, post D-I-V-O-R-C-E, and I have been working like a madman, writing 100 mini bios for a trade publication, which became much more labor intensive than I imagined because of a vile battle with Excel. Who the hell ever deemed that the industry standard for spreadsheets? It could not be more user-unfriendly.

I was at my desk at 5:15 this morning and now, 17 hours later, I have at last finished the draft, et al. Saturday I'll start anew, giving all a crisp proof, edit and critical read before I send it away. If I successfully deliver, this could lead to semi-regular assignments—essential now that I've lost the rent $$$ from my partner. My career as a freelance journo is launching into uber-mega-high-hustle gear. I've also renewed my commitment to mystery shopping. There you have my two cents for the day, cool cats.

Unemployment Locked At 9.1%; Underemployment Leaps to 16.5%

Not to belabor the point... (Hey, get it? Jobless humor!)... but September remained as bleak as the past two-and-a-half years, with unemployment locked tight at 9.1%. The figure has remained above 8% since mid-2008 and at 9.1% for the past three months. More than 14 million Americans are without work.

The Labor Department claimed Friday that 103,000 jobs were added last month, which, in the grand scheme, still means one in six are out of work, and shit out of luck.

The true unemployment rate actually jumped from 16.2% in August to 16.5% in September, which adds 2.5 million “underemployed workers” — those not working that have given up on the job hunt. An additional 9.3 million are working part time and would rather work full time.

Meanwhile, The Wall Street Journal reported earlier this week that U.S. corporations now have revenue surpluses in excess of $2 trillion. Obviously, they are not using their massive profits to either increase infrastructure or add workers.

The stock market reacted to the job report today with a Dow Jones drop of 47 points, as everybody realized nothing has changed.

Politicians on both sides of the fence abused the statistics to spew more bullshit: The White House interpreted the report as a call for Congress to pass President Obama's $447 billion jobs package proposed last month, which would extend and enlarge a temporary cut in payroll taxes—truly meaningless—and extend unemployment benefits. Republicans, of course, blamed Obama for "failed policies," however, have yet to come up with any plan of their own to bring any hope of an end to the Second Great Depression.

Diary Of A Layoff: Long-Term Unemployed Coming Out Of Hiding

For whatever reason, it appears the long-term unemployed are coming out of hiding. I saw this piece from John Douglas Marshall in The Atlantic last week and now this wholly relatable story appeared on Salon.com, written by Amy Gutman. Following is an excerpt that rings all too true...

Of all my accomplishments, the most impressive is absent from my résumé: my more than two-year stint of job searching and unemployment. If you've been unemployed you already know this, but if you haven't, here's a news flash: Coping with prolonged joblessness is hugely demanding. It requires deep reservoirs of fortitude, faith, patience, courage and self-control.

There is a distinct Groundhog Day quality to days spent looking for work: Write letters. Prepare résumés. Search job boards. Make phone calls and brainstorm over coffee. Sleep. Get up. Repeat. After sending off my materials, I often hear nothing back. I've long since lost count of the number of jobs I've applied for.

As an "older worker"—When did that happen?—I try to ignore a drumbeat of statistics telling me I face an uphill battle. It's hard not to feel worn down, to succumb to "learned helplessness," our innate tendency to give up when efforts fail to yield results. Still, like millions, I keep going.

My exertions often seem strangely invisible, not only to family and friends but increasingly to me—an experience widely shared in job-loss land. Studies show "a growing isolation, a warping of family dynamics and slow separation from mainstream society" among long-term unemployed. No other circumstance triggers a larger decline in well-being and mental health than involuntary joblessness. Only the death of a spouse compares.

Such findings are all the more disturbing given that unemployment is a fact of life for a fast-growing segment of the American population, as reflected in last month's 0% net job growth. At the start of this year, the average unemployment duration of more than nine months was longer than it's been since the Bureau of Labor Statistics began tracking the figure in 1948.

You don't have to be a mathematical genius to see that when there are six job seekers for every job, it's simply not possible for everyone to find work. For one, they (we) are competing for positions not only with other unemployed workers but also with applicants already in the workforce looking to move on. They (we) are also contending with biases against the unemployed, including the proliferation of "unemployed need not apply" caveats on job ads.

So how is it that so many have come to disdain the unemployed? To equate unemployment with failure and shiftlessness? 

Contempt and shame are becoming inseparable from unemployment. Fueling such attitudes are the pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps philosophy widespread among conservatives. Not everyone will agree that the nation's unemployed are entitled to be treated with respect. To skeptics: Consider your self-interest. Things are likely to get worse before they get better for the U.S. economy. More jobs will be lost; your turn may be next.

Hi, it's me again... Of course, what makes these articles even more difficult to stomach are the venomous comments that appear below them from readers... This story was no exception. "Whine fucking whine, oh poor me," wrote one, who suggested the author collect aluminum cans for recycling. Others insisted she "move to where the jobs are"—as if selling one's home in the midst of the Second Great Depression is a viable option. Another: "She's a lazy, whiny slob who needs to get off her fat ass and get a fucking job." Or "Shut the fuck up, you sad sacks bitching!" America the beautiful, indeed.