The Recession Is Over... Oh, Whoops!

Nationwide unemployment figures released Friday reached an all-time high in recorded American history, at 9.7%, with 570,000+ employees out of work since the "recession" began at year-end 2007. Can we finally stop saying the friggin' recession is over, for god's sake?

On Thursday, while back in Brooklyn, I spent three solid hours in earnest, ultimately proving to be an idiot, searching online for a full-time job. Ready? Journalismjobs, mediabistro, theladders, monster, hotjobs, jobster, the Chronicle of Higher Education, craigslist, topusajobs, job.com... Know what I found? Unless I want to be a nurse or have an expertise in finance, I'm more or less fucked.

Any positions in the field that I have worked in for the past 25 years—journalism, writing, editing, reporting, words—offer one of three options: 1) internships without pay 2) entry-level assistant positions for next to no pay and 3) HTML, online and social networking expertise for less $$ than years that I have been alive.

Dear God: Please let this book sell, so that I can avoid this madness forever more. Amen.