
NIGHTMARE ON MONTAGUE… and YOU ARE INVITED!!!
Cool cats, please mark your calendars… and let’s get this party started
Saturday, December 5 is:
* A good month following Halloween… wow, no pesky costumes!
* Post-Thanksgiving… you don’t have to include your family!

* Hanukah? Bite me. Christians, Muslims and agnostics invited!
Please join us for VIP entrance to the NIGHTMARE ON MONTAGUE… Details, please:
THE EVENT: If you've been here before, you know this as the fall event not to be missed, a bash where you can see ALL those folks that you like pretty much, but not enough to insist on one-to-one drinks or dinner. See how easy we’re making it for you?
WHO: You, your best pals (please feel free to bring), lovers and one-night stands (TBA!); hosts and your dearest friends Chuck Taylor & Ayhan Sahin; our adorable, proactive bartender Patrick; cousin Claude and his really funny rubber buck teeth; lots of gorgeous strangers wearing revealing outfits; AND the

WHEN: For god’s sake I already told you: Saturday, December 5, 8:30 p.m. until the cocks crow.
WHERE: 62 Montague Street, Apt. 2C, Brooklyn Heights, New York City.
HOW: One easy subway stop from Manhattan on the R (Court Street stop), 2/3 (Clark Street), 4/5 (Borough Hall) and A (High Street) trains. You can even drive here if you're rich enough to own a car. Oh, and cabs know us, too.

NIGHTMARE ON MONTAGUE?: We used to toss a little get-together every October, beginning back in 2000. We’re re-theming. Otherwise, it’s the same damn thing: a frat party for grown-ups.



Year 1, September 23, 2000
Chuck purchases an apartment in May in Brooklyn Heights, NYC; celebration ensues four months later. Your host spends weeks making CDs for the party—quaint now in the iPod era. Goldschlager turns the event into a Bacchus-worthy toss-up, complete with public shagging on the fire escape. Nine years later, still proud of that. 80+ attend, mayhem ensues until 5 a.m. An annual event is inevitably hatched.
Year 2, September 22, 2001
Just 11 days after September 11, a decision is made

Year 3, September 28, 2002
Chuck turns 40, leprechauns dance, we host two drag queens, seven people spend the night in the living room, four of them on the sofa bed—one never identified in the post-mortem. Strangers kiss in private corners. A return to form. Body count: 110.

J-Lo calls, saying she is so over Ben and wants a husband. Meets Marc Anthony along the Starfucker Wall. Bob Hope declines—then dies, as a result. Chuck & Ayhan purchase their first iPod, meaning there’s enough music to party until 2004. Dawn arrives. Eye drops are exchanged like Xanax.
Year 5, October 16, 2004
ABBA reunites for one night only and everyone poses for pictures and gets autographs. Benny chokes on a cheese puff, but giggles


Year 6, October 15, 2005
We host a small, private cocktail party that you weren’t invited to, because you tend to chew with your mouth open and spit a little when you talk with enthuse. Turkey’s biggest superstar, Sezen Aksu—the Madonna of the nation—sits on our sofa and Ayhan gets all shy. We chose not to serve cheese balls. But, boy, she sucked down those cosmos.
Year 7, October 14, 2006
The party is re-themed as “The Devil Wears Target.” It has a decidedly global presence, with stunningly good-looking visitors from numerous European nations. Video is shot for the first time (and we subsequently collect $$$$ in blackmail payoffs). The turnout surpasses 2002, with 118. Chuck reasons that he is loved. Our year-long toothless 4.5-pound senior rescue doggie, Kirby,

2007: Chuck frets that no one loves him. Ayhan vacations in San Juan. Cheese balls are considered passé as an “early millennium” phenom.
2008: Chuck decides he doesn’t like anybody. Instead of hosting a party, he spends $15,000 renovating the bathroom.
And now… Year 9… Chuck’s meds are working again! Cheese balls are timeless, and already in da house. We love you and you love us! Come back and stay. Join us, won’t you?
If NY was only slightly closer to GA. I'll be rehearsing hard for Tuna Christmas by that time Chuck, but it sounds like a blast. Can I come in spirit at least?
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