Well now, isn't this sweet? Fergie Fergetha—who proved once and for all on Super Bowl Sunday that she is nothing more than a studio robot whose talents would be better suited to Hooter's than the pop charts—has come to the rescue of poor Christina Aguilera.
Isn't that kind of like a flea defending a blue whale?
Aguilera may have flubbed the lyrics to the National Anthem (Jesus, can we please let it go?), but she was otherwise pitch-perfect, while Fergetha screeched, wailed, shrieked, bellowed, wailed, yowled and squawked through a ghastly 12-minute performance with her equally incompetent Black Eyed Peas comrades will.i.am and the other two nameless dudes.
"It's such a huge venue, your nerves take a hold of you. I completely understand," said Fergie, oozing implausible empathy on a radio show Tuesday morning. "She's one of the best singers of our time. Nobody can take that away from you. But you get nervous at these things. We're human."
And then adding a statement as overt as the sky is blue, Fergetha added, "Some of my notes were pitchy to me. But it was so exhilarating. That's a once-in-a-lifetime thing."
Given the fact that the Black Eyed Peas delivered one of the worst halftime shows ever, let's pray she's right.