Fire Island: It's A Man's World

End Of The Poodle Cut

Finally, my grossly needed summer haircut. Above, how I looked this morning and below, a wholly unedited, totally realistic look at the after-cut.Okay, okay, here's my poodle head, for real, from this past weekend. Ew.

Yes, We Can... But Don't

Perhaps the most disappointing variable of California's 6-1 vote to uphold the rust-ridden Proposition 8, which upholds the state's belief that gays and lesbians are second-class citizens, is the gutless silence from the White House. President Obama campaigned on a platform of inclusion and justice for all American citizens. Now, like President Clinton, he not only appears to have forgotten his promise to end Don't Ask, Don't Tell, but as the nation moves forward—and backward—in securing marriage rights for gays, the president—who should surely be appreciative of overcoming much prejudice in his career—has not one word to say.Here's a statement on the Prop 8 ruling from the L.A. Gay and Lesbian Center: “While upholding the legal marriages of the 18,000 same-sex couples who married in California, the ruling establishes that all Californians are NOT entitled to equal protection of the law. This is a setback for the cause of freedom and fairness. But every noble struggle has been filled with losses that people had to endure and overcome. Not only are courts and legislatures recognizing that it’s wrong to discriminate against any group of people by denying them the fundamental freedom to marry the one they love, but now even a majority of Americans agree. That is enormous progress and we cannot let one election, one court case, one defeat stop us. Ours is not a fight simply for the freedom to marry. Ours is a fight for full equality; full equality and nothing less.”

Penn Badgley: Handsome

Britney & Madonna: 2019

Fox News: What are the most-photographed stars going to look like in 2019? We went to forensic artist Joe Mullins to find out. Mullins took recent photos of paparazzi favorites Britney Spears, 27, and Madonna, 50, and aged them each forward one decade (to ages 37 and 60). “An adult face can change significantly in the span of 10 years, depending on your life style,” Mullins said. “A quick aging trick is place your hands on the side of your face and pull down. Gravity is not kind to most of us.”Geez, they sure look like the same person to meese...

Print Publishing: The End

If this Rolling Stone cover doesn't signal an official end to print publishing—as well as the collapse of all humanity—then God, just shut up shop and let the dinosaurs rule the earth again. As if Lady CaCa weren't already the ugliest woman alive, she somehow manages to doll herself up in even more of a gruesome fashion. Straight men, run for cover!

Isn't it ironic that on this same day in 1647, Alse Young became the first person executed as a witch in America when she was hanged in Hartford, Conn. Times just don't change, do they?

Johnathon Scaech-ed

I'll never understand why Johnathon Scaech didn't become a major super-stud... but he certainly never failed to look good in whatever parts he played. This is a new photo of him making the rounds on the Web. Sure looks like a star to me.

Tinatin's Victory Celebration!

The only thing more beautiful than the weather outside on this perfect May day is our celebration with Tinatin to acknowledge her runner-up victory at this year's Eurovision. Her Icelandic entry, "Is It True" is my No. 1 song for first-quarter 2009. She was over this afternoon to record and write with Ayhan, and we celebrated with champagne and cake.

Beach Weekend

The Smoking Gun is heading off-site for the weekend, to Fire Island's Cherry Grove with our buddies Bob & Tim. Internet service is scant at best, so we'll be sans service and thus taking a posting break for the next few days. Kirby's godparents Patty & Tina will be manning the homefront here in Brooklyn. Cheerio!

American Idol: Conspiracy Theories!

The Web is hysterical with theories about how "American Idol" favorite Adam Lambert somehow lost tonight to Kris Allen... was it indeed a conspiracy against the gay guy? I must admit, I come at this as a casual observer. I've watched the past seven seasons, and as a Billboard writer, had the opportunity to meet many of the winners, not to mention years of interviewing the top 10 on tour with Fred Bronson, writer of the Billboard Radio Countdown, which I hosted—but I took this year off, completely. Until tonight, thanks to Tivo.

So I truly had little investment in Adam and Kris. I watched them perform on the Tuesday final... and frankly, the former reminds me of Sam Harris, who won "Star Search" in 1984, singing "Over the Rainbow" with over-the-top overtly gay bravado. Kris seems to be the more versatile presence... and boy he's awfully handsome... so, it seems to me that the potential for "teen idol" status with Kris getting the crown rivals last year's David Archuleta, but adding sex appeal that Archie was just too goofy/young to possess. That is actually a rather significant factor here.

Again, coming at this blindly, sounds like Kris, the less bombastic presence, will get his due as the winner, while Adam, because of his larger-than-life image, will excel because of massive press in his favor. Will be interesting to see, without the burden of the crown, if he is comfortable declaring to the masses that he is indeed the flamboyant queen that he has displayed with gusto. It will then be fascinating to see how mid-America responds.

Hollywood's Most Beautiful...

Not one unkind word to say about Kate Hudson. She presents herself beautifully, avoids the tabloids as best she can and is a wondrous talent. Love, love...

Carpenters No. 1 In Japan!

Paul Grein, one of my journalist heroes from the 1980s at Billboard, now writes the weekly Chart Watch column for Yahoo! He reports the gratifying news that the Carpenters—my beloved favorite first group—scores a No. 1 album in Japan this week, with "40/40."

He writes: "Carpenters' '40/40 The Best Selection,' a 40-track collection marking the duo's 40th anniversary, jumps to #1 this week in Japan. Karen and Richard are the seventh American act to top Nielsen/SoundScan's Japanese chart in the past five years. They follow Bon Jovi (Have A Nice Day and Lost Highway), Britney Spears (Greatest Hits), Destiny's Child (#1's), Linkin Park (Minutes To Midnight), Backstreet Boys (Unbreakable) and Madonna (Hard Candy). In the same period, two other international artists have risen to #1 in Japan: England's Oasis (Don't Believe The Truth) and Canada's Avril Lavigne (The Best Damn Thing). Japan is the world's #2 music market, behind only the U.S.

Among the duo's countless hits on my own yearly chart, their biggest is "Top of the World," which ranked No. 1 in 1972, followed by "There's A Kind Of Hush," No. 4 in 1976, along with countless others. (Thanks Jon Konjoyan for the tip.)

Perry Payne Is Back: LIVE!

Top Richest 'Idols'

On the eve of this season's "American Idol" finale, Forbes has tallied the top-earning alums, based on a year's worth of album sales, concerts, merchandising and other income.1. Carrie Underwood = $14 million
2. Jennifer Hudson = $5 million
3. Kelly Clarkson = $4.2 million
4. Jordin Sparks = $3.1 million
5. Kellie Pickler = $2.3 million
6. Clay Aiken = $2.2 million
7. Chris Daughtry = $2 million
8. David Cook = $2 million
9. David Archuleta = $1.3 million
10. Taylor Hicks = $300,000

Certainly drives home the fact that this pageant is big business first, and entertainment far, far, far in the distance. (Photo: ohnotheydidnt.livejournal.)

AfterElton's Hot 100 Gay Icons

Now here's a Hot 100 with real relevance (without the likes of Lady GaGa disgracing the top spot). AfterElton.com has released its 2009 list of gay male icons. An out gay man finally topped the list, after Jake Gyllenhaal was the victor for the past two years. The site reports that out gay men snagged nearly 20% of the spots, including the top three: "To be sure, we’ve nothing against our straight male crushes, but it says something great about 2009 that there are so many out men to choose from."

Indeed. I consider how many out gays there were when I came out in 1985... um, Sal Mineo? And he was dead...

The top 25:
1. Neil Patrick Harris
2. John Barrowman
3. Luke MacFarlane
4. Jake Gyllenhaal
5. Jensen Ackles
6. Chris Evans
7. Cheyenne Jackson
8. Hugh Jackman
9. Gale Harold
10. James Franco
11. Zac Afron
12. Jared Padalecki
13. Anderson Cooper
14. Gareth David-Lloyd
15. Matthew Mitchum
16. Adam Lambert
17. Jo Weil
18. Brad Pitt
19. Thöre Scholermann
20. Van Hansis
21. Ryan Reynolds
22. Jake Silbermann
23. Paul Rudd
24. David Beckham
25. Chad Allen

Beautiful Beyonce

Wow! Beyonce is on the cover of Self this month. You'd never know what a shrill siren she is based on the stunningly beautiful photo spread. Kudos.

Penelope Cruz At Last Shows Skillz

The world's worst actress (who is starring in the upcoming "Nine" with Fergie, the world's worst singer, along with Nicole Kidman, Kate Hudson and Sophia Loren), at last shows that she has one talent. And even that's a stretch (har har).

Joe Jonas InStyle... Exploitation Or Sexy?

InStyle's sopping photos of Joe Jonas make me feel... uncomfortable. He's 19 (oops, I had him as 17), so I suppose the Jonas Brothers' lead singer is old enough to flaunt his blossoming sexuality, but there's something here that just makes me a might bit ill at ease... If Miley Cyrus did the same, she'd be skewered—a double standard, no doubt—but I dunno. Perhaps being twice his age and then some has a lot to do with it. Ryan Reynolds... any day... Joe... is this exploitation?

Mark Sanchez In GQ Retro Spread

GQ features NFL hottie Mark Sanchez in a retro photo shoot that conjures beach fashions of the 1970s: short-cut swim trunks, So-Cal-style tank tops and zip-front windbreakers. Good googa-mooga, it's almost enough to make me watch a football game. This young man, whomever the hell he is, shouldn't be hiding under a helmet. Photos by Carter Smith.

Say It's Not So

Kirbisha: That's A 'Wrap'

Thanks For Reading!

Whoa! I opened a counter on The Smoking Nun exactly five months ago, and in that time, the blog has logged more than 14,100 hits from 86 nations, including Rwanda, Cambodia, Egypt, Israel, Croatia and many more. How remarkably gratifying.

While this destination is undoubtedly self-indulgent, perhaps to a fault, I am interested in knowing what is of the most interest to those that visit, so I am planning my first-ever poll to find out why you visit. Hope you will take a minute to respond. I'll keep writing, and hope you'll keep reading. Cheers, cool cats!Here's to my everyday visitors!

Lego Candles

Lego remains my favorite toy of all time (um, well into adulthood). Check this out: Lego candles! Cool cats, my birthday is just around the corner (Sept. 28). I want! See at this super-cool store: A&R.