Welcome To Hampton Roads!

And so a new life chapter has begun! I arrived in Norfolk, Va., before 1 a.m. on Tuesday, January 15, after a ridiculously melodramatic (read: egregious) exit from New York City—details to come... So much to report, aside from quick postings on Facebook... and let's begin with one of so many amazing links to the legacy of my new home here...

Today I lifted the bench of the piano that was left in the house, and found a yellow, ready-to-crumble newspaper article from August 1968, profiling first owner Margaret Daugherty.

She was an English professor at Old Dominion University (then ODC: Old Dominion College), which cast her as a non-nonsense teach who had no interest in her students' personal issues or coddling them... "I assume they're there to master the material. I have a standard which either they meet or they don't. If they become articulate in an area, they are more defined as people."

In addition—how cool is this?—Mrs. Daugherty (Dough-er-ty, as I recently learned from my next door neighbor) was the daughter of Grand Ole Opry founder George Hay. Can you imagine the parties she and hubby Guy hosted in the day? (I intend to carry on the tradition, thank you.)

Much digital enhancement to put this amazing keepsake back together! This is going in a frame, on the wall, pronto (click on image to see full-size).

NYC YA! One Week To Go Before A Spanking New Chapter...

At last... It was back in September when I traveled to Hampton Roads to sniff out whether the metropolis in Virginia was fitting for my next chapter in life. I had no inkling that after looking at more than a dozen homes I had saved online on Trulia.com, that I would visit that one 1962 Mid-Century Modern property in

Norfolk, Va., walk in and say, "I wanna die here!"

And then the whirlwind began. I placed my Brooklyn Heights apartment on the market in mid-September—fully renovated after 13 years—and garnered my first offer before my first official Open House.

Ultimately, four offers were considered, and it was the second that captivated me: A couple already based in the neighborhood, due with their first child, along with a letter explaining how they loved the nabe and my apartment. Don't think for a second that the emotional plea doesn't matter. Mind you, they also had the best offer and solid financials. I'm no dummy, you know?

It's been a loooooong road from there to here, with an aggressive bidding back and forth on the property in Norfolk (I did just fine) and more bureaucratic hoopla in the months since than I ever imagined possible. Believe me, New York's novel "coop" mandate has more by-the-book rules than any Catholic school.

Now, at last, I am a week from my (long) awaited transition. I'm still working through so many details... finances from here to there, turning off utilities here, turning on utilities there, making sure I have Internet there, bank hoo-ha, checks, title mess, fees, attorneys, scheduling... Honestly, I watch these house flipping shows on HGTV and I wonder... How the hell? One transition over the past 20 years is just about a full-time occupation.

Thursday night I am offering all of my beloved New York City connections over the past 18 years to come together for one last toast. Chuck's NYC YA! is taking place tomorrow... and I have a feeling I'm going to be crying a bit. Cause that's what I do. Leaving the life I have loved for almost 20 years is really hard. But on the other side... so many new possibilities. Taking chances and starting anew is what the adventure of LIFE is supposed to be. I can't wait. *

NYC Arctic Blast: Coldest Day Since 1896

Oh, come on! One of the primary reasons I'm ready to dodge New York City is because I loathe the winters here... Not only are they tenacious (Spring? What's that?), but it's no fun to battle the cold when all one

can do is walk, take public transportation, walk... and feel the blast of consistently vulgar cold, snow and ice, with no escape. (See photo taken UNDERGROUND at an NYC subway station Tuesday.)

But Tuesday was ultimately ridiculous. Much of the entire nation was gripped by this wicked bitch of a blast—and in NYC, we broke a 118-year record amid the so-called "polar vortex." Temps reached 4 degrees, which was 2 degrees COLDER than this day in 1896.

Wind chills, meanwhile, hit minus 17 degrees. I believe it, considering that my teeth felt like they were going to fossilize into dust and my ears would snap off with another breeze along the Brooklyn Heights Promenade. Good god, get me the hell out of here... *

Deep Freeze: Temps To Drop 40+ Degrees Over 24 Hours!

This Monday morning it's raining lightly with a pleasant, unseasonably warm 51 degrees at 8 a.m. In 24 hours, the world is going into a deep freeze, as temps drop an astonishing 42 degrees, to 9. Mind you, add in a brisk lil' breeze and we've got a "Wind Chill" of -11. What the hell?

The bitter cold comes out of the Midwest, before spreading south and east. Already, Monday morning, wind chills in the minus 40s and minus 50s are sending much of Minnesota and North Dakota into a deep freeze. Weather.com is kind enough to note that at wind chills of 50 below zero, any exposed skin can suffer frostbite in as little as 5 minutes.

Daily record lows are possible Monday in at least two dozen major cities from Texas to the Midwest, including Minneapolis/St. Paul, Kansas City, and Austin, Texas.

Looks like I better get the doggies walked stat! Ain't nobody gonna be happy walking around windy Brooklyn Heights 12 hours from now. By 8 p.m. Monday, the wind chill in NYC will reach 19 degrees. Oh, happy day. *

UPDATE: This weather event has become such a nationwide phenom that they've given it a name: Polar Vortex. Coolio, man!

The Taylor Top 50 For 2013!

Hey, hey, hey, Cool Cats... It's time for the annual Taylor Top 50 for 2013. I've been compiling my own year-end countdown since 1981, when Sheena Easton helmed the initial chart with "Morning Train." More than 30 years? How is that possible? *

 1. Stars—Grace Potter & The Nocturnals

 2. Loved Me Back to Life—Celine Dion

 3. Get Lucky—Daft Punk f/Pharrell Williams

 4. Just Give Me A Reason—Pink f/Nate Ruess

 5. Shadow—Brittnee Belt

 6. Loveblind—Junior Turner f/Jess Wood

 7. I'm Never Too Far Away—Jon Secada

 8. Water And A Flame—Celine Dion

 9. Water & A Flame—Daniel Merriweather & Adele

10. Heart Attack—Demi Lovato

11. Stay—Rihanna f/Mikky Ekko

12. Better Day—Junior Turner f/Jess Wood

13. Hurt You—Toni Braxton & Babyface

14. Wrecking Ball—Miley Cyrus

15. Love Is A Confession—Tom TC

16. Troublemaker—Olly Murs

17. Wish You Were Here (The Leo Song)—Sefi

18. Say Something—A Great Big World f/Christina Aguilera

19. Between The Raindrops—Lifehouse f/Natasha Bedingfield

20. Being Me —The Strange Familiar

21. I Knew Your Were Trouble—Taylor Swift

22. My All—Anthony Callea

23. Picking Up The Pieces—Paloma Faith

24. Come and Get It—Selena Gomez

25. Human—Christina Perri

26. Wanted—Hunter Hayes

27. Broken Man—Peter Wilson

28. Echo (You and I)—Anggun

29. The Boy Can Dance—Afro-Dite

30. When I Was Your Man—Bruno Mars

31. It's a Beautiful Day—Michael Bublé

32. Army Of Two—Olly Murs

33. Army Of Me—Christina Aguilera

34. People Like Us—Kelly Clarkson

35. When You Really Loved Someone—Agnetha Fältskog

36. Treasure—Bruno Mars

37. Beautiful—Mariah Carey f/Miguel

38. Home—Phillip Phillips

39. If I Never See Your Face Again—Maroon 5 & Rihanna

40. Love Can Move Mountains (Live “The Voice”)—Celine Dion & Tessanne Chin

41. Different—Robbie Williams

42. Roar—Katy Perry

43. You Set Fire To My Life—Tina Arena

44. Summer Romance—Ren Harvieu

45. How Do You Keep the Music Playing—Celine Dion

46. Goin' to L.A.—Pietro Lombardi

47. E Ti Prometerro—Josh Groban & Laura Pausini

48. Beautiful—Carly Rae Jepsen & Justin Bieber

49. Let Me Go—Avril Lavigne & Chad Kroeger
50. Open Up Your Arms—Ren Harvieu

And the No. 1 Album of 2013... (Duh!)... "Loved Me Back To Life," Celine Dion

The Taylor Top 40 No. 1 Song Of 2013

Revealed... Despite waiting six years for the new English-language album from Celine Dion, the No. 1 song of 2013 on the long-running Taylor Top 40 (since 1981, cool cats) is... Grace Potter & The Nocturnals' stirring ballad "Stars."

I first heard the song while watching videos on Fuse network, and amid so much crap within the playlist (Justin Timberlake with a great song ruined by a dissonant rap from Jay-Z, for instance), this song made me sit very (very) still... as lead Grace hits that crazy beautiful high note over and again. And the song builds to a crescendo that continues to leave me breathless.

Considering that I first heard this hit in the early part of 2013 and it has maintained it potency throughout the year gives me all the more confidence in loving this as my top track of the year gone by.  Stand by for the FULL Taylor Top 40 for 2013. *

New Year's Resolution 2014: Stop Dropping The F-Bomb!

After accidentally letting the F-bomb drop while talking to my mama on Thanksgiving Day (she did not care for it), I have resolved that it's time to clean up my damn mouth. And so: Working to stop using "F*CKING" as a casual adjective. Fortunately, there are still plenty of filthy descriptors at my disposal. I mean, I'm no (smoking) nun, after all.

Bloomberg's Brilliant Bike-Share Program Forgot One Thing... Winter

FORMER (hurrah!) New York City Mayor Mike Bloomberg's pervasive attempt to supplant NYC as a pedestrian-friendly urban city into a biker's paradise with his May 2013 Citibank-sponsored Citi-Bike Share program got a bit of a reality check with the 10-inch dump of snow Friday morning.

It appears that Nanny Bloomberg forgot that for six months of the year, it's WINTER in the city, as some 10,000 bikes sit in their holsters, lining hundreds of New York City Streets, ready to turn to rust. Oops... dummy.

The Villager reported that amid this week's wintry blanket, "While the plug wasn’t pulled on the system, for all intents and purposes, it was out of commission, with conditions unfit for riding." You think?

It appears that Bloomberg has retreated from public office just in time for successor Bill de Blasio to have to figure out what the hell to do with THOUSANDS of metal bikes sitting on public streets that are covered in snow, slush and ice, ready to rust. Here's one more Bloomie effort whose backdrop is spelled like this: I-D-I-O-C-Y.

Tech... And That's The Way It Is...

The inaugural New Yorker magazine cover for 2014 reveals how society has become so entrenched in technology that it is no longer able to live in the moment. Artist Chris Ware explains his inspiration on the mag's webbie—which follows a similar Halloween cover from 2009 (right).

Ware writes, ever so wisely, "Sometimes, I’ve noticed with horror that the memories I have of things like my daughter’s birthday parties or the trips we’ve taken together are actually memories of the photographs I took, not of the events themselves, and together, the two somehow become ever more worn and overwrought, like lines gone over too many times in a drawing.

"The more we give over of ourselves to these devices, the less of our own minds it appears we exercise, and worse, perhaps even concomitantly, the more we coddle and covet the devices themselves."

Damn, so true. I'm no martyr here. Often, an event I partake in comes off as only as worthy as the photograph that might come out of it. Good time? Oh, yeah! No photo? Compromised. Perfect example is when I had the pleasure of seeing Celine Dion in NYC last November. I indulged every second of her performance, but remained focused throughout... wondering... Will I see Celine, get another Starfucker photo, update my wall o'Celine... And so it is. And we (all?) are. *

Happy New Year From The Smoking Nun!

Good to be back, cool cats, after more than a year of taking a blog breather! Ah, The Smoking Nun reinvigorated... That feels might nice. You know, I think I sabotaged myself by insisting on posting every damn day, whether or not I had anything meaningful to share, which led to this destination veering off course. No more... I'm here when I got something to talk about. And I hope you'll join me, yes?

Please stand by for consistent pop culture musings in 2014, along with week-by-week NEWS about my brand new life chapter in Hampton Roads, Virginia, come mid-January (including step-by-step renovations fab fun!) *

New York City On High (Wowsah!!)

Saturday, I visited longtime pal Pamela Whamela Seaton and her fellow D.C. friends, who were staying overnight at the... ahem, Trump Soho Hotel. Mind you, this was no slummin' kinda room. They were in a 2-bedroom, 3-bathroom penthouse suite on the 43rd floor.

The views... all I can say is when you check out these pics, there are NO WORDS. Damn. *

NYC's The Donut Pub, 14th Street & Broadway

Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays!

On this Christmas Eve 2013, I am thankful for LIFE, friends, love and the possibilities of my new chapter in the coming year. Bless us one and all, cool cats. Below, one final Christmas, Brooklyn Heights-style.

And, alas, my last NYC Christmas, truly, when the city shines its brightest... *

Celine Dion Demonstrates Her Might On 'The Voice' Finale

"Incredible" isn't just the name of Celine Dion's fabu duet with Ne-Yo... It also describes to a "T" her performance on NBC's live finale of "The Voice" last week. She also performed a sky-scraping scat-packed rendition of classic "Love Can Move Mountains" with newly crowned winner Tessanne Chin. See the performances here and here!

In addition, on December 18, Celine hosted the 15th annual "A Home For The Holidays" special, performing tracks from new album "Loved Me Back To Life," alongside Ne-Yo and Chris Young.

The album LMBTL is now four times Platinum in Canada, two times Platinum in France, two times Gold in the U.K., and Gold in Belgium, Hungary, Poland and South Africa, selling (a comparatively humble) 1.3 million copies worldwide. Following its early

November release, "Loved Me Back To Life" soared to No. 1 on iTunes in 44 countries.

In Canada, the disc has remained a Top 10 hit since its release—selling 105,000 copies in its first week, making it the highest sales chart debut in the country since 2008. In the U.K., the album has also remained lodged in the Top 10 since its release.

To support the release, Queen Celine has blanketed TV, including U.S. appearances on "Today," "Late Night with Jimmy Fallon," "The View," "CBS This Morning," "Ellen," QVC and "The Dr. Oz Show" (yep, I've seen every one of them) and in the U.K., on "Strictly Come Dancing" and "The X Factor." And, of course, she continues her sell-out show in Las Vegas at Caesar's Palace. Bravo, girl!

P.S. No wedding ring on "The Voice." Starting to get anxious about the continuing reports that her marriage with Rene Angelil is troubled. Uh oh. *

ENCORE: A Spanking New Life Chapter

In the immortal words of Peter Brady, “When it’s time to change, you’ve got to rearrange.” And so, after 18 years of living in New York City, I am leaving the metropolis to launch the next chapter of my life. Yup, it’s a tough decision, but the result of two years of careful consideration.

Over 10 days in September, I shared on Facebook: “10 Reasons It’s Time To Leave NYC," and now offer an encore, with all the goods packed into one post...

#1: I miss driving. I miss outdoor space. I miss spreading my arms without hitting a wall. I dream about a gentler quality of life...

#2: NYC is a city of dreams. I’ve had a wondrous, indelible, fulfilling, rewarding, spirited chapter here, and I lived out my lifetime ambition at Billboard magazine to the fullest. Now let’s make room for somebody else’s dream.

#3: Dogs were designed by god to run with the wind, not trail behind on a leash sniffing cement. Offering my Abby & Spencer freedom to roam fills me with glee.

#4: All I need to write are a keyboard and my fingers. I have the great fortune of a portable talent.

#5: I’m 51. I came to New York at 34. Alas, no longer do I desire to carouse the East Village until 3 a.m. NYC is a playground for the younger. Growing older in New York is unquestionable for many. But I have options and freedom… let’s see what's behind Door No. 3.

#6: After fastidiously paying off the mortgage for my Brooklyn Heights apartment in eight years, shelling out a monthly $1,100 “coop maintenance fee” for the privilege of living in a building (albeit, beautiful) with 30 other families is madness… & maddening. Enough, already.

#7: When guiding a lawnmower—and driving a car—sound more appealing than riding the subway, I’m thinking it’s time to turn the page.

#8: When I was in my 20s, a friend said, “Some people are lucky. It’s an energy. They have an inherent ability to generate good things for themselves. You are one of those people.” Over the past four years, I haven’t felt lucky. It’s time to reignite that force field—with the challenge of a new adventure.

#9: In Baz Luhrmann’s “Everybody’s Free To Wear Sunscreen,” there’s a line, “Live in New York once, but leave before it makes you hard.” OK, I still choke up when I listen to Celine, I giggle when the doggies yawn & I swoon over a Brooklyn Heights sunset… but let’s not risk it, y'know? I want to leave New York while I still love it.


And now… THE REVEAL! In October 1995, I came to NYC for my life-long dream job at Billboard magazine—rewarded with a stupendous career, committed friendships, a 10-year marriage and an apartment in a majestic nabe. But over the past couple years—as a single freelancer hustling for every dime in a $$$$ city—I felt the itch for change.

First order of business: Can you leave the world’s greatest city without wincing? Reflecting on my 20s/early 30s in beloved DC, I concluded that yup, a new locale offers opportunity for spanking new adventures… But, uh, where?

My checklist: warmth, water, s-p-a-c-e, grass, a car(!), a job(?)... and a gentler quality of life. After months poring over real estate listings in Las Vegas, Phoenix, St. Petersburg, Austin, on & on, I found my next promised land.

If the puzzle pieces snap into place, in 1Q 2014, I shall relocate to HAMPTON ROADS, VA., comprising Virginia Beach & Norfolk. My Brooklyn Heights apartment thankfully has sold. I now await the processing of contracts & piles of legal hoo-haw. Meanwhile, I have had the great fortune of finding—and buying—my dream home in Norfolk.

This mid-century modern property was built in 1962, faces 400-acre Lake Whitehurst, offers a generous yard for Abby & Spencer to run & roam—and as my Virginia realtor Katie Zarpas squealed, “This is the ultimate bachelor pad!” Think “Mad Men.”

It wasn’t a requirement of relocating, but as a bonus, I have 15-year dear pals in Virginia Beach: Mary & Bill and Francie are just down the road.

I hope to see youse at the First Annual Hampton Roads Housewarming Party! Y’all come see me, you hear? Thanks for reading.