Your Morning Coffee Klatch: Fun Gay Stuff In The News

Here are some endearing headlines in the global news about all things queer. This will rev up your morning with some good shits and giggles, for sure.

A 74-year-old grandmother has been charged with assault after she offered a Bible-thumping anti-gay preacher a kiss on the cheek at a Gay Pride event in Salisbury, N.C., last weekend.
Joan Parker admits she offered the minister a little love when he screamed "sodomites" and "you're going to hell"at march  participants. "I thought he needed a hug," she says.
Minister of the New Light Baptist Church James Edward Belcher, of Taylorsville, N.C., alleges the kiss was "one of many attempts to silence the preaching to those in need of salvation who practice a death style that they call a lifestyle."
I see his point. I remember my great aunts kissing me as a child, with a hint of a mustache and some oddly stale breath. It certainly scared the bejesus out of me.

Tea Party Presidential candidate Michele Bachmann's husband Marcus is a therapist. But he sounds more like a southern preacher in a recent quote, in which he calls gays "barbarians." Actually, what he really sounds like is a closet queen. Have you heard this big girl talk?
Queers "need to be educated. They need to be disciplined. Just because someone feels it or thinks it doesn’t mean that we are supposed to go down that road," he chirped. "We have a responsibility as parents and authority figures not to encourage such thoughts and feelings from moving into the action steps. The percentage of homosexuals in this country, it is small. But by these open doors, that it is starting to increase.”
Another brilliant elocution from the mind of an imbecile. I bet he can't wait to replace the White House china pattern as our new First Lady.

India’s health minister warns that the "disease" of homosexuality is now "fast spreading" in the nation! Ghulam Nabi Azad told a conference Monday that "gay sex has now unfortunately come to our country and there is (sic) a substantial number of such people in India."
He added, "Even though [homosexuality] is unnatural, it exists in our country and is tough to detect."
Homosexuality was decriminalized in India in 2009 when the Delhi High Court struck down a law that made same-gender sex punishable by up to 10 years in prison. Apparently, Azad has had his head up his ass for the past two years.

Wahhh!! National Organization for Marriage prez Brian Brown was caught crying into his hankie in the New York Senate galley following passage of the state's marriage equality bill June 24! Blogger Alvin McEwen wonders, "Why the hell is Brown crying? His marriage isn't affected by what happened in N.Y. If anything, based on the ridiculous 'we may be down but we aren't licked yet' tone, one can predict some financial raises in Brown's future."
McEwen aptly compares Brown's breakdown to "a spoiled, petulant child throwing a tantrum because he simply can't get his way," which pretty much sums up the entire movement against marriage equality. After drying his eyes, Brown vowed to raise $2 million to retaliate against New York GOP state senators who voted for the Marriage Equality Act. Thanks buddy! Let's get some more Democrats in the New York Assembly.

An Islamic religious scholar addressing the annual Journey of Faith Islamic conference in Toronto, says that homos who confess to their illicit behavior or are seen performing gay acts"by four reliable witnesses" must be executed by stoning.
On the other hand, lesbians "should only get lashes," he said.