Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Deal With It, Darling


Dethroned Idaho Republican Congressman Larry Craig was served just deserts when the Minnesota Court of Appeals denied his second appeal against charges that the homophobic gay is guilty of a misdemeanor for disorderly conduct after he solicited sex with a male cop in a Minnesota airport bathroom stall in June 2007.

Honey, it's time to give it up. In this second rejection, District Judge Charles Porter deemed his original confession “accurate, voluntary and intelligent, and supported by the evidence.” The despicable 63-year-old responded, "I disagree with their conclusion and remain steadfast in my belief that nothing criminal or improper occurred." And in denial, I suppose, that the press is onto something since reports first surfaced in the early 1980s that he persistently stalks gay men in secrecy.

The good news is that his fight cost the curmudgeon a half million dollars. The bad news is that his wife Suzanne (whose three children were adopted by Mr. Craig; note, none of their own) is likely bearing the brunt of the financial strain. I just hope she has a fabulous home, many mink coats (which her husband, no doubt, twirls around in while she's buying groceries at Kroger) and a friendly gentleman who can satisfy her womanly needs.

There is little more egregious than hiding in the closet—it's 2008, people—and not only publicly denouncing homosexuality, but willingly casting a career of legislation against civil rights.

I am utterly delighted—and spinning around myself—to see the closet door (or in this case, the bathroom stall) slam in Larry Craig's face. I am saddened that he continues to live with such shame and deny his homosexuality. Sweetheart, look at Jim McGreevey... there is peace and joy in accepting oneself... I pity this person. And nothing is sadder than bestowing pity upon another.

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