Given my druthers, I'd have been out and about today. Given my health and the fact that I haven't had a voice for the past three days, I forced myself to stay in. What better gay way to slow a Sunday down to a crawl than watch The Miss America Pageant! Can you imagine that Atlantic City deemed the competition too tacky to host (pot, calling kettle), so it moved to Vegas.
Of course it goes without saying that the prettiest one onstage was host Mario Lopez. He is fine. I was all about Miss New York, Leigh Taylor-Smith, until she wore the ugliest evening gown I've seen since... well, since Star Jones' dress a few posts down. The 
bikini contest... oops, I was washing dishes during that part. The talent segment was the best, when Miss Hawaii Nicole Fox performed a frightening tribal dance (above), obviously inspired by the cannibals on "Gilligan's Island."
The winner was Miss Indiana Katie Stam, who was so hysterical when her name was announced that she kept swatting at the outgoing Miss America as she tried desperately to lasso the sash around her. That was fun.In all seriousness, TLC did a nice job updating a concept whose relevance is long past (yeah, scholarships, public service, blah blah, they still have to parade around in bikinis and heals). The Loser's Lounge was fab (esp. when the bottom 36 whimpered on-camera). In all, I've seen worse episodes of "Ugly Betty."
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